Somewhat Random Musings of My Ever Twitching Fingers

(Preface: This is a re-post of a note that I wrote on Facebook back on October 20, 2011. I'm surprised I hadn't posted it earlier, seeing as its title is Word Once Withered's tagline.)

Usually, when I write a note, it contains words of my short stories or poetry. In this case I am writing for the hell of it. Because I just feel like speaking to no one in particular. But to you. I feel like writing to you.

Making the world your own is ridiculous. "The world is what you make it." F*** you. How about I rip your heart out and you go on making your world happy. Have fun with that.

Sometimes you can make the world, but the conditions have to be perfect. You have to have all of the ingredients. You can't build on top of a wreckage. You have to clear the build site first. Metaphors aside, when you are broken and feel the pain of such, you cannot simply move on or be happy for whatever arbitrary reason you try to rationalize.

You are going to feel the pain and it is going to hold you under the surface. You will resist. You will say that everything is going to be okay, even though you can't bring your head above the water. Soon the hand that holds you under will weaken and retreat. You're not dead. Sometimes people will die... But you're not dead. You've become numb. So numb that you don't even realize the force is gone. That you can pull yourself up. You remained submerged. Rarely, another hand will come along and help you out.

Here, though, when you're head remains submerged and nothing is keeping you there: that is when the conditions are perfect. You are numb. You are empty. The only thing holding you back now is you. You and, perhaps, "a sick desire for self-abuse." But here is where you can make the world.

The world is what you make it? No. The world is what you and 6,000,000,000 some odd other people make it. It's not just your world. It's a world you occupy with those around you. So if you do want to conquer the world, maybe you should conspire with those around you, friends, enemies, and those in between.

This world is full of sick, broken people, and you are one of them. Fix yourself. I don't know how you're going to do that, but you need to. For you, for me, and those in between. "Be the change you want to see in the world." It's a lot like voting in a presidential election. For the US, you are simply one in 300,000,000 people. Who are you? You are one lonely number. For changing the world, you are one in 6,000,000,000 people. Who are you? No one. You pracitcally don't exist.

So why change the world and why try to make it yours? Just be you. No rationalizations. No hesitation. Just act. Just be. If you're sad, I'm here to help you through it. If you're happy, I'm here to enjoy it with you. If you're somewhere in between, I'll be here to figure out where you stand.

The world can be what we make it. For ourselves. In our tiny little bubble. Everything else can be forgotten. Do all you need to do all you need to do. But do it for you. Because everyone else is doing for themselves. Nothing's wrong with that. Nothing's wrong with you.

One last thing. I love you. That's all. No need for explanation. Just acceptance.  Whoever you are, my dear reader, I love you.